


And We Danced

by merycula (thanksillpass)



Category: Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Dance, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, Step Up AU, obviously I know nothing about American education so the Institute is governed by my made-up rules, the differences between the books and the show are kind of blurry so it's a mess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-17
Updated: 2016-07-17
Packaged: 2018-07-24 11:40:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7506889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thanksillpass/pseuds/merycula
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Alec believed a lot could be said about a person from the way they danced – it was all in the way they moved, how they cooperated with the music to convey a unique message. That didn't apply to Magnus at all. To Alec, Magnus was inscrutable, an impenetrable fortress of secrets and promises. All he could tell by the way his hips moved was that Magnus Bane was a sinner."</p><p>Step Up AU, in which Alec is a ballet performer, Magnus is a hip-hop dancer, and they fall in love.</p>
            </blockquote>





	And We Danced

**Author's Note:**

  * For [arrafrost](https://archiveofourown.org/users/arrafrost/gifts).



The path of Alec Lightwood's life had been preordained. Or, well, at least very carefully planned. No reason to make it sound like he was born to join an everlasting war between demons and humankind, or something like that. He was supposed to graduate from The Institute, join a professional dance company, make his parents proud. It might not involve any life-threatening bloodshed, but it was still a lot of pressure, considering that his mother held over-high expectations, as a strict parent, extremely goal-oriented person, and the president of the most prestigious performing arts conservatory in New York, possibly the country. It was... a lot of pressure.

But Alec was good. He was brilliant, actually – not a genius like Jace, but he worked hard all his life, and he was a goddamn brilliant dancer. His senior showcase was going to blow everyone away, Alicante would offer him a job, and he would finally make Maryse proud. A straight and narrow path lead to his life's goal, and nothing would distract him from achieving it – not Izzy finally dropping out to do some shady underground thing, not Jace recently taking on some redheaded freshman charity case that didn't know the first thing about ballet (aka girlfriend), not Lydia having brunch with his mother like she was something more than his dancing partner.

Certainly not Magnus Bane... _existing._

Until recently, Magnus has been just a rumor and a face in the yearbook. He wasn't exactly popular – Alec would even go as far as to call him notorious. Magnus was too unconventional and flashy for the Institute's standards, so almost no one wanted to work with him, and while people were attracted to his good looks and charm, he did _not_ mingle well with over-privileged and self-involved wasps attending the school. Alec didn't have the time outside practice to pay too much attention to fellow students who didn't directly affect him, so that was the extent of his knowledge about Magnus Bane. Until recently, that is.

“When I decided to open up to you, and share this incredibly intimate composition with you, I expected _help_ , not ridicule! I will not be held back for the third year in a row, because you can't grasp this simple concept, Samuel!”

“For the last time, my name is _Simon!_ And I can't grasp, _or_ help you with, something that doesn't make any sense! No one can! Crazy people can, maybe! Tell him, Raphael! This makes no sense! Why are we working with him again? Do not ignore me, Raphael, I demand answers, it's your fault we're here!”

Alec had to stop in his tracks, and sneak a look inside the room, because he' taken it upon himself to break up the fights ahead of time, before Jace showed up, and things escalated beyond any control (Jace was furiously protective of the Institute, as it's apparently saved his life, and he didn't tolerate anything that could tarnish its reputation). Alec was surprised to see that the commotion was just Simon and Magnus sitting in safe distance from one another, shouting at each other from behind their laptops, while Raphael leisurely drank tomato juice in the corner, wearing sunglasses, probably hungover; on second thought, it could have been a blood mary. To Alec's despair, Simon noticed him before he could flee, and immediately pulled him into the room.

“Alec, listen to this. Listen to this _cacophony,_ and tell me if you could dance to it. Go on, listen. Listen and weep.”

Alec rolled his eyes, but he accepted the headphones. Normally, he would ignore Simon, who was nothing but an annoying extension of Clary in his opinion, but he had to admit he was curious about Magnus's work. It was somehow exactly what he expected from the infamous Magnus Bane, but also nothing he could ever anticipate in the entire world. It was perhaps slightly chaotic, and it sounded unfinished, but it also felt natural, considering the source. Alec felt a reflexive surge of jealousy towards the person who managed to create and perform a dancing routine to a piece like that. It wasn't anything he's ever worked with before, as his mother insisted on a more conservative musical upbringing, but it pulled at something in him, something raised on classical music and ballet, and it was disorienting to listen to hip-hop and feel _nostalgic_. He put down the headphones, and met Magnus's eye for the briefest moment, involuntarily flushing under his causally curious, but still scorching gaze.

“Well?” Simon kept tapping his foot impatiently, arms crossed on his chest.

“I couldn't dance to it,” admitted Alec.

“Ha!” shouted Simon triumphantly, throwing his hands in the air.

Alec rolled his eyes again. _“But_ I'm not a hip-hop dancer. This could work, I guess. Anything can work, provided you have the right dancer. Is that all? I'm already late.”

“Well!” Magnus cleared his throat, and got up from his seat, arrogant smile stretching his lips. “Let this unhelpfully ambiguous answer be a lesson to you, Stanley, that _I'm_ the expert here. No offense, blue eyes. It clearly needs more work, though, so I _will_ see you tomorrow. Raphael, my utmost gratitude for your assistance, but do not offer me alcoholic drinks again – you know this school doesn't condone underage drinking. Now, if you excuse me, I need to go tell the Chairman that I love him and that he is an inspiration.”

Simon groaned in frustration as Magnus unceremoniously left the room, although Alec wasn't sure if Magnus ever really did anything without ceremony. It took him a moment too long to shake off the daze that being exposed to Magnus for the first time has left him under, but he eventually regained control over his limbs, and left the room without acknowledging either of the boys who's already wasted so much of his precious time.

Lydia didn't get angry with him (she never did), but she was visibly tense with the effort not to. Alec understood why Maryse liked her so much – Lydia was talented, determined, persevering, and insanely disciplined. She was a good partner, and they turned out to be compatible, but it was difficult to get used to her at first, simply because he has spent nearly all his life practicing with Izzy, who brought unrestrained joy to her dancing, and could synchronize with him perfectly, just because she _didn't care._ Not like Lydia cared, almost zealously, or even like Alec cared, instinctively, because it's what he's always cared about; all Izzy wanted was to have fun and make Alec happy.

“Come on, Alec, let's practice,” Lydia urged on, less tense now, even cracking a gentle smile. “Sometimes I think I care more about _your_ showcase than you do.”

Alec didn't think it was true, but maybe it was. He appreciated that Lydia was putting so much of herself into a routine with him, considering she had one to prepare for herself next year, but he couldn't help thinking, sometimes, very occasionally, almost never, really, that something was missing. He didn't think it was because of Lydia, or Izzy, or Jace, or his divorced parents, or anyone, because he'd mastered separating dancing from his personal life. There was just... something missing, but it was easy enough to ignore once Lydia put on the music.

Or maybe it wasn't, because his head clearly wasn't in the game, and they ended up staying so late it was ridiculous even for the two of them. Lydia was panting on the floor for a few minutes, exhausted and frustrated, and Alec half-expected her to just storm out without even looking at him, which he wouldn't blame her for, but she sighed and got up slowly, methodically toweling her face and neck as she approached him. Putting her hand on his shoulder, Lydia looked him in the eye, genuine concern written all over her kind face, and waited for an explanation; Alec had none to offer.

“I'm sorry, Lydia,” he managed. “I don't know what's wrong with me today.”

“It's okay, we all have bad days. Just make sure you're up for it next time you take four hours of my time. I do have a life outside of you.”

Her tone was light and almost teasing, but Alec felt gutted all the same. He knew very well that not being able to offer his best was unfair to Lydia, when all she did was support and motivate him, and he could only apologize again. She smiled at him before she left, and Alec decided to stay sprawled on the floor where he belonged. He wasn't allowed much time to wallow in pointless self-pity before Jace's and Clary's heads came into his field of vision. He sat up and swirled around to face them, immediately scowling; most students left the Institute flushed and sweaty, but Alec could tell their latest exercise was of a different nature than his.

“Hey, Alec, you done?” asked Jace in lieu of greeting. “We saw Lydia leaving.”

“Are you heading home too?” added Clary, annoyingly warm and welcoming. “We're just gonna grab Simon before we go. We could wait for you, if you want?”

“Do we really have to 'grab Simon' before we go?” Jace protested, his hands sliding up her waist.

Clary rolled her eyes, but her smile was shy and her eyes clouded, and Alec could tell she was the tiniest bit tempted. Their seemingly unending honeymoon phase honestly made him sick, and their giddy giggling, not to mention the _plurals_ , were worse than chalkboard scraping. He identified the feeling as jealousy, because he wasn't as emotionally stunted as Izzy liked to imply, but he also acknowledged that he wasn't jealous of Clary anymore – he rather envied them both what they had with each other.

“Don't wait up,” he said dismissively, not accounting for the questioning looks he got in return. “I need to practice! I mean, clean up after practice. Clean shower would be-- That is, I need a shower and... stuff.”

He cringed, cursing the gene pool for giving all the bullshitting skills to Izzy, and leaving him with _that._ Jace shrugged, oblivious as usual, and Clary nodded, smiling sympathetically. Alec waited until he couldn't hear them anymore before lifting a finger, and even then he took his time getting ready to head out. It wasn't the light coming out of one of the rooms that stopped him on the way out, it was a low hum of a now familiar tune that made him feel even more nostalgic than before. He swallowed, quietly approaching the door.

“Thanks, Sidney, you can skedaddle now,” said Magnus loftily. “Your girlfriend and her boyfriend are waiting. I promise not to break any of your toys. Bye-bye now!”

Simon was so furious he didn't even notice Alec as he stormed off. He left the door open, and when the music blasted on full volume, Alec dared to take a look inside. He instantly backed off with a gasp, because he was _not_ prepared to see Magnus Bane stretching, wearing a very tight tank-top and sweatpants that hung very low on his hips. Wasn't he in music arrangement, cupped up behind a computer screen all day? What was he doing being all well-toned and flexible? Alec was honestly appalled. Next thing he'd know Simon had a six pack. Casting one final glance at Magnus dancing, Alec hurriedly left the Institute, because spying was rude and unbecoming.

That's why it made no sense that he came back the next evening to spy. In his defense, he didn't mean to, at first. His and Lydia's session went infinitely better this time, which was a huge relief, and Alec was leaving the school without the heavy burden of yesterday's doubt and insecurity. This time, before he reached the ground floor, the lights caught his attention before the music did. Through the glass wall he was passing, he saw Magnus one floor below, dancing to his composition. Was dancing even the right word? Alec has never seen anything like this, and he's seen Jace and Izzy dance.

It was... he couldn't put it into words that made up a coherent sentence – he only had single words to use to describe what he was seeing. It was hip-hop, for one. It was uninhabited. It was expressive. Fluid. Light. Over-the-top, but that could just be Magnus. Exciting. Liberating. Natural. Really, really _hot_ , but that could just be Magnus as well. Before Alec knew, he watched the entire routine three times, picking up on the subtle changes Magnus implemented, and even noticing when he made a mistake. It was inexplicable, but there was something magnetic about his dance, and Alec was completely immersed in watching it. He was so mesmerized, he nearly jumped when Magnus suddenly lost his footing, and kicked the table with the stereo system, one or other piece of equipment wobbling and falling on the floor with an unpromising sound.

“Oops, Steven will be mad,” muttered Magnus without remorse.

Alec barely held back the laughter bubbling in his throat. With an oddly satisfied sigh, he picked up his stuff and went home.

But he came back the next evening, and the next. He started staying behind to watch Magnus dance every night, actually. It didn't interfere with his schedule, and it was refreshing to watch a routine so drastically different to his own. He found himself involved in the evolution of both the music composition and the steps, not to mention Magnus himself. Alec believed a lot could be said about a person from the way they danced – it was all in the way they moved, how they cooperated with the music to convey a unique message. That didn't apply to Magnus at all. To Alec, Magnus was inscrutable, an impenetrable fortress of secrets and promises. All he could tell by the way his hips moved was that Magnus Bane was a sinner.

Alec never came out to anyone. The only people who knew were Izzy (“Hello, I'm your _sister_ _!”_ ) and Clary, who seemed to compensate for the complete lack of any common sense and self-preservation instincts with some kind of sixth sense when it came to seeing right through people who never wanted to be seen through. Alec obviously still held some animosity towards Jace's girlfriend, because people didn't get over their first crush just like that, but that wasn't the point. The point was, Alec knew coming out as gay when he planned to live his life in the spotlight wasn't the best idea, but Magnus Bane made him want to shout, “I am _so_ gay, the gayest even, do you want to be gay together?” So, naturally, what he did was _lurk,_  because he was a pathetic creep, and Magnus was this radiant, magical thing that moved in a way Alec could never even dream of.

It was genuinely unfair how talented Magnus was at dancing, when he obviously only did it in secret. Maryse would lose her mind over him if she'd ever see him dance, Alec was sure of that. He couldn't understand what Magnus was doing spending his days in front of a laptop with _Simon_ of all people, when he could be wholly focusing on perfecting his routine for the showcase – he'd be beating job offers with a stick. Alec actually started researching the showcase and its numerous loopholes that would allow Magnus to perform regardless of his major, when the subject in question gently knocked on the open door, startling him.

“Don't look so surprised, lemon drop,” said Magnus, his voice low and seductive, at least to Alec's ears. “You were taking longer than usual, and I didn't want to start without you.”

Alec gaped, stunned. “What?”

“Oh, is this the part where we pretend you didn't not-so-secretly watch me practice every night?”

“Y-yeah, well... I guess- I m-mean, I guess we can... Yeah, we can skip that part,” Alec stammered out eventually, hating himself with every fiber of his being.

Magnus clapped his hands happily, offering a blinding smile, and left the studio without any indication that he expected Alec to follow him; Alec did anyway. The distance they had to cross to reach Magnus's working space was enough for Alec to recover enough to ask the question that's been weighing on his mind all this time, even if he still lacked basic social graces about it. He awkwardly grabbed Magnus's elbow, causing him to stop abruptly and turn around, watching Alec curiously with slightly narrowed eyes. He reminded Alec of a cat.

“Why don't you dance here? I've _never_ seen anyone move like you, you... You should be dancing.”

Magnus looked pleased, but he waved his hand dismissively. “Yes, yes, I'm well aware of how amazing I am, thank you, carrot cake. As I'm sure _you_ are aware of this fine Institute's well-established classical leanings, momentarily forgotten because of my overwhelming brilliance. Sorry, oatmeal cookie, but this is it for me. While I'm convinced I would look absolutely fabulous in a tutu, hip-hop is what I want to do, and they can't help me with that in here. What they _can_ help me with is making my own music I can dance to, so that's what I'm here to do. And I do it marvelously, if I do say so myself. Does this quench your curiosity, apple kneel?”

His own naivety hit Alec like a ton of bricks. He was so impressed with, and captivated by, Magnus's dancing that it didn't even cross his mind that hip-hop wasn't considered _refined_ enough for this school, or for the kind of companies that would be recruiting during the senior showcase. Dejected, he simply nodded, having nothing sensible to say, and Magnus winked playfully before turning around. Alec felt kind of stupid being unable to respond in any way, afraid he'd appear awkward or anti-social, both of which were coincidentally true, so he blurted out the first thing that came to his mind.

“Alec. My name's Alec. You don't have to call me after... um... sugary snacks?”

Magnus looked at him over his shoulder, smiling. “Cocktails, actually. And I know your name, dummy. I know every attractive person's name.”

Alec blushed, unsurprisingly, and followed Magnus into the room to watch him practice.

He half-expected Magnus to thrive with an audience, to take the performance even further and beyond, but then again, he'd been aware of Alec watching him from the beginning. It was Alec who was oblivious to so many aspects of Magnus's performance, never allowed close enough to notice – of the way he scrunched his brows in concentration and bit his lip, the way his skin glistened with sweat, and his fingers moved as if he was casting a spell. Alec was definitely charmed, though that seemed like an understatement. At this point, he could probably call it for what it was – a big fat crush. He resisted at first when Magnus offered to teach him “some moves” one day, because it sounded tacky and silly, and Alec definitely lacked the unrepressed _looseness_ he thought hip-hip required.

“You know, Alexander, I would _never_ ask you to do anything I didn't wholeheartedly believe you'd benefit from.”

“Really? I can't see how bringing you coffee every evening is beneficial for me. Or you, for that matter, you take too much sugar.”

Magnus grinned unabashedly. “You're collecting brownie points you can exchange for a toaster at a later date. Come on, I know it's a foreign concept to you, but _trust me_. Just try! You might even think it's fun. Or is that a foreign concept as well?”

Well, that was definitely a challenge, if Alec's ever heard one. Despite the initial mortification of feeling like a particularly stiff trained monkey, Alec eventually relaxed enough to actually enjoy it. Magnus was a good teacher, and he was great at making people feel at ease, if he wanted to (he didn't, usually), so Alec was grasping the basics in record time. By the end of the week, he wasn't anywhere near the level of proficiency that his mother, for instance, would demand of him, but dancing with Magnus was primarily “just for fun,” and Magnus was pleased with his progress.

“You're a natural at this. Maybe you're wasting your talent on-”

“I'm not wasting anything,” Alec shot back, a tad too defensively. “I love ballet, okay? I'm not just doing it because it's expected of me, you know.”

Magnus held up his palms in a gesture of surrender. “Forgive the follies of a young, brash mind of a Brooklyn boy straight out of high school. Oh my, that's the only time I use the word _straight_ in a self-descriptive sentence. Look at my hands, Alexander, they're shaking! What if I break out in hives now?”

Grinning, Alec shook his head in fond exasperation, feeling the tension leave his body. When Magnus smiled at him, Alec's heart fluttered dangerously.

He knew next to nothing about Magnus, and he'd never liked anyone except Jace, so he was on guard, not to say in denial, but he knew he was starting to feel _something_. His skin prickled with heat every time Magnus looked at him, and his stomach swooped whenever he caught himself thinking about him. Maybe it was just a combination of hormones and fascination, but Alec liked to think it was more than that, because it felt really nice. Magnus made him laugh in the most inappropriate moments, and made him blush in the most unfamiliarly pleasing ways. He inspired Alec, and continuously opened his eyes to ideas and points of view he never would've considered. Most disconcertingly, he made him feel desirable – Magnus was generous with simple compliments that baffled and embarrassed Alec more often than not. For the first time in his life, Alec felt appreciated for something else than his dancing by someone from outside of his family.

Those disorienting, but not unwelcome, feelings grew stronger every day he spent with Magnus. Even if they didn't see each other that often outside of their usual late night practice, which involved much more talking ( _and_ grinding) than was strictly necessary, in his opinion, Alec slowly learned more and more about this cryptic man, though he suspected he was only scraping the surface. He found out that Magnus practiced steps as he walked, had an absolutely shameless fashion sense and even worse pick-up lines, haven't seen the keys to his apartment in approximately two to four years, constantly lied about his past and his age, and wasn't actually romantically involved with any members of the board of directors, but had a cat named Chairman Meow. It wasn't much, but it was enough for Alec to start falling for Magnus, which was, frankly, a little terrifying for someone who prided himself in being in total control of himself, and never did anything reckless or impulsive.

“Something is different about you, I can smell it.”

Izzy obviously couldn't smell anything on him except the usual sweat and desperation, but she _was_ his sister, and Alec wasn't surprised she became suspicious as soon as she saw him for the first time since Magnus Bane became a part of his life. Alec's really missed her. She looked positively vibrant, and despite the fact that her trip with Meliorn ended in a break-up, it definitely did wonders for her skin and general disposition. She showed up in the Institute immediately after stepping off the plane, and demanded to see the final version of his routine, unhealthily interested in the progress he and Lydia made, possibly out of misplaced jealousy.

“And I know you'll never tell me, so I'll just have to find out myself. Maybe with a little bit of Clary's help. If I can detach her from Jace's face for long enough, that is. Hmm... I'd assume you finally got laid, but I'm of strong opinion that you're one of those people who simply don't survive an experience like that, so it must be something less exciting. Did you, like, take a day off from practice and discover trees?”

Alec rolled his eyes, pushing Izzy into the room. “You're cracking me up, Isabelle, truly. Now, do you want to see what we've got, or not?”

“I do, but I was hoping to hear all the gossip first,” said Izzy, pouting briefly before breaking into a grin. “Hi, guys! Guess who's back even more beautiful and awesome than ever?”

She was wrapped in Jace and Clary's conjoined arms in ten seconds flat, both promising to fill her in on everything, which was a blatant lie – these two knew nothing about the real life outside of their little love-sick bubble. Izzy and Lydia had a professional, but icy relationship, so they just nodded at each other, and Simon probably thought Izzy was so out of his league he'd spontaneously combust if she touched him; he was possibly not wrong. Alec was getting impatient, because Izzy and Jace were the ones whose opinion mattered the most to him, and he couldn't wait for them to finally see what he had prepared for the showcase.

“You will have plenty of time to catch up _after_ I'm done baring my soul to you guys through the medium of classical ballet.”

Izzy gasped in mock offense. “Who died and made _you_ the head drama queen?”

“You dropped out,” supplied Jace, laughing.

Izzy punched Jace's arm, and Alec felt a surge of warmth at the carefree atmosphere around him. Gaining confidence from Izzy's encouraging grin alone, he motioned for Lydia to start.

At first, it was just like a hundred other times they did this, but something in him broke suddenly, and he felt unusually light, as if he weighed nothing, and Lydia weighed nothing in his arms. Some people often compared dancing to flying, but Alec had never felt even close to it until now. That's why he was so thrown off when Lydia suddenly just _stopped,_ and let out a startled laugh, looking at him like he's grown a second head. Everyone else was unnervingly silent, and it was even more obvious when Simon turned off the music.

“What was that?” Lydia asked, still chuckling.

Alec was really confused. “What do you mean? I thought it was going great.”

“These moves just now. They're not in the routine. They're not even ballet. That was... I don't know, funky weird. Like something you see on videos of people dancing in the underground stations. You're honestly telling me you didn't notice doing it?”

“You totally did it,” Jace piped in helpfully.

Alec had no idea what they were talking about, and Izzy's uncharacteristically thoughtful expression alarmed him. He tried to retrace his routine step by step, and remember if he did anything out of place, but every step he took felt so natural to him that he wasn't even taking them consciously. He paled upon the realization – he'd never in his life not paid extremely careful attention to his every move. Shit.

“Someone better start explaining what happened to my brother in my absence,” said Izzy evenly, revealing nothing of what she was thinking.

Alec's throat was dry. “Izzy, come on, it was just a mistake.”

“You don't _make_ mistakes,” reminded Lydia.

Everyone nodded, familiar faces displaying various levels of shock and bewilderment, and Alec felt despair overtake him. Clary was staring at him with that look in her eyes, like she actually saw inside his head, his heart even, and played with the dusty old boxes hiding his deepest secrets and desires with an innocent, yet calculating, curiosity of a child; Alec felt angry and helpless. When he turned to Jace for help, he seemed distant, a small frown of confusion being the only thing his otherwise expressionless face betrayed.

“Maybe Alec spends too much time with Magnus,” offered Simon The Traitor suddenly.

Alec felt his soul leaving his body when Izzy snapped her owlishly big eyes to Simon, tuning in for an influx of new information. Why would he even mention Magnus, when it had nothing to do with him? Alec made one mistake during his dancing routine, and the universe was punishing him by revealing the only secret he's managed to, _wanted_ to, keep from his friends. He shot Simon his best death glare, and he was mildly satisfied with the way he visibly shrank in on himself.

“What?” he demanded, crossing his arms. “It was kind of hip-hop-y, slash campy... Very Magnus Bane, if you ask me. I'm somewhat of an expert on him, since he's been recently plaguing my existence on regular basis, and Raphael's knows him since, like, kindergarten or something, and hip-hop and camp are unquestionably my immediate associations. You did a set of very Magnus Bane moves there, Alec. What?! Stop trying to kill me with your eyes, or you'll get an aneurysm – even your distaste for me isn't that powerful! Besides, Lydia said so too. Not in so many words. She kind of said so. She definitely _meant_ so, didn't you, Lydia? Back me up here, sister, I'm running out of steam, he's terrifying.”

Alec swallowed, taken aback by Lydia's curt nod of acknowledgment even more than Simon's senseless ramblings. He incorporated some of Magnus's hip-hop moves into his ballet routine and didn't _notice_? They felt _natural_ to him? They made him feel like he was _flying_? It made no sense. Hip-hop had never evoked anything like that, not to mention even _ballet_ never had, so what the hell happened? Alec needed to sit down, and take a deep breath – no one seemed to have caught on on his mental breakdown yet, and he would very much like to keep it that way. Luckily, Jace came to the rescue with his pragmatic problems of the most popular guy in school:

“Okay, hold up for a sec. What are you hanging out with Magnus Bane for? He's trouble.”

“Oh, come on, Jace, really?” Clary protested, cheeks pink with righteous indignation. “You don't even know him.”

Jace scoffed. “I know he's weird!”

“Hey, _I'm_ weird too.”

“Yeah, but you're good weird. Cute weird. Hot weird. Perfect hair, and skin, and smile weird.”

“I'm gonna throw up,” said Izzy and Simon in nearly perfect unison.

Alec was so appalled by the scene that he momentarily managed to forget about his existential crisis. Lydia didn't say anything either, but her pinched expression indicated she would much rather be anywhere else in the world right now; Alec could sympathize. Except Lydia was free to simply excuse herself without raising suspicions, which she promptly did, suggesting they should take the rest of the day off for Alec to catch up with his sister, which roughly translated to sorting out whatever he was going through before involving her in any way. Ever the one to instantly pick up on social cues, Simon eventually took off with Clary, and Alec half-expected Jace to start disintegrating, but his presence in the room remained as solid and pressuring as Izzy's.

So he told them everything. And by everything, he meant that he skipped a few details, like the fact Magnus has been actually teaching him to dance, or the frequency of their meetings, or how he'd probably cry for a week if Magnus suddenly told him to get lost. Basically, he told them he's been watching Magnus dance occasionally. He lied, is what he did. Jace was causally displeased, like with most things in the world, but begrudgingly supportive, because at the end of the day, even if he had his doubts, he was Alec's best friend, his brother. Izzy was rather intrigued, and Alec could only hope she wouldn't reach any incorrect conclusions about the relationship between him and Magnus.

“Well, I thought it was interesting,” said Izzy. “I never would've expected such bold, _rebellious_ moves from you. I want to meet Magnus.”

Alec spluttered, flushing. “He's busy. I'm busy. I need to go. I have to talk to Lydia.”

He wasn't going to talk to Lydia. He was going to find Magnus, and tell him he couldn't do it anymore – that it interfered with his own thing, and that they could still hang out, but Alec couldn't dance with him anymore, because he couldn't have hip-hop steps just casually seeping into his ballet routine like that. He's worked too hard for everything to jeopardize it only to have some fun, and be close to a boy he liked and wanted to spend time with, constantly. Oh god, how was he going to say all that without losing Magnus for good? He regretted not actually sitting down and having a quiet think, because before he could even begin to come up with a solution, he was in the room where Magnus usually worked on his music. He was the only one there, and he positively lit up when he saw Alec; Alec's chest felt tight.

“Alexander, am I glad to see you! I need to show you something. So, obviously, I've been diligently working on my piece in secret – yes, I can multitask too – and Seymour actually does have some valuable input to offer, sometimes, and... Well, let's say you've unlocked something in me, so please just listen to it, before I embarrass myself any further. I think it's finished.”

Feeling himself blush at the sight of Magnus's reddening cheeks, Alec accepted the headphones, swallowing audibly. Visibly nervous, Magnus actually exhaled before pressing play, surprising Alec – he never imagined Magnus was capable of caring about other people's opinion about anything, let alone someone as far from an expert as Alec. Before he could reassure Magnus in any way, the music started playing, and Alec's breath caught in his throat; it was possible he held it until the piece ended. The new version was a combination of Magnus's original hip-hop composition, and that melancholic classical feel that captivated Alec before, only now it was more prominent. Before, Alec could only catch mere glimpses of it, but now it was perfectly accompanying the basic melodic line. It took him somewhere he couldn't quite place, like a fantasy land where everything was simply _right_. Alec felt at peace, in complete harmony with himself and the world, and something in him unlocked as well.

“Can I take it home?” he blurted out.

“Does it mean you think it's good?” asked Magnus, uncharacteristically uncertain.

Alec didn't hide his surprise. “You really care what I think?”

“Alexander, honestly...” Magnus frowned, his lips a thin line. “I'm not going to get mad only because I know it's a genuine question, and not fishing, because for some unfathomable reason your favorite pastime is doubting your own worth. _Of course_ your opinion matters, you're important to me.”

Alec could only blush furiously, unable to reply in any coherent way; he would never get used to Magnus being so honest and open with his feelings. For a moment, Alec was overwhelmed by gratitude that this incredibly gifted, fearless, generous, and completely  _unreal_ man would share his unbelievable creation for the first time with him, of all people. He tried not to think of himself as undeserving only because he knew that would upset Magnus, who truly cared about and appreciated him, which only made Alec want to kiss him more. Really, it was bordering on absurd how much he wanted to kiss Magnus in that moment.

“It's... It's like _magic_ , Magnus.”

Magnus inhaled deeply, eyes widening almost comically. He cleared his throat, clearly embarrassed by the compliment, which was honestly bewildering – Magnus usually thrived on attention and admiration. Running a hand down his flushed face, Magnus covered his mouth with it, but not before Alec saw his lips quiver with the urge to smile. Heat pooled in the pit of his stomach when Magnus averted his eyes shyly for a brief moment, before lifting them to look at Alec like he's never been looked at before; it was equally terrifying and exhilarating.

“You can take it home, Alexander,” said Magnus, casing the disc for Alec. “I can almost feel Scott disapproving, but he's boring, and it's very entertaining to imagine you cry yourself to sleep while listening to it because it's just too good to process without an excessive emotional reaction.”

Alec grinned. “Close enough. Thank you, Magnus.”

On an impulse, he put his hand on Magnus's shoulder, and leaned in to place a chaste kiss on his cheek; it was hot to the touch, and Alec missed the warmth even before it was gone. Everything kind of stopped for a moment, narrowed to Magnus's loud, sharp inhale when Alec's shuddering breath hit his slightly wet skin, just before he pulled off completely – Alec's never done something like that and, judging by his thundering heart and general lightheadedness, there was a good reason for it. Unable to look Magnus in the eye and face his reaction, he snatched the disc, and ran out of the room. All of the alarms in Alec's head were going off, and he wasn't sure if it was because of what he did just then, or because of what he was doing right now.

Cursing under this breath, he shook his head, as if there was a way to physically remove the thoughts from his mind through his ears – he _really_ didn't have time for feelings. He didn't have time for anything, to be honest, so he turned off his phone, and went straight home. He needed to cool off and concentrate, because hearing Magnus's music gave him an idea, or rather watered the seed of a concept his subconscious has already tried to communicate to him through his body. It wasn't that dancing with Magnus corrupted him in some way – the confounding, weightless feeling he'd experienced earlier that day didn't come from hip-hop, but from combining it with ballet. Izzy was probably going to kill him for ditching her, but Alec had a dance to choreograph.

He really expected to be at least slightly at a loss for what to do, but once he let his instincts take over, it was the most natural thing he's ever done. Alec felt like he was only liberating something hidden deep inside him that, once freed, instantly started living its own wild, exceptional life. When he was finished, Alec nearly vibrated out of his skin with the need to share it with Magnus; he was rather startled by the fact it was already morning, and he actually _could_. Running on coffee and exaltation alone, he probably scared Magnus a bit with his urgency and excitement, but Magnus rarely questioned him, as accepting as one could get, and he immediately agreed to watch Alec dance, putting on his music. Alec was laser focused, but he still couldn't help catching glimpses of Magnus's eyes widening and face flushing, and it filled him with a sense of accomplishment like nothing else before. Alec knew it was unconventional enough to capture Magnus's attention, but he hoped it was also good enough to impress him.

“So what do you think?” asked Alec, far from casually.

“I love it, Alexander, obviously. I'm actually rather speechless, you must give me a moment.”

Alec was breathless, and not only from the exertion. “Do you mean it?”

“Of course! It's absolutely astonishing. It's... symbiotic. A perfect balance, between hip-hop and ballet, between my music and your steps, I mean... _How_ did you accomplish all this in one night?”

“I didn't sleep,” Alec admitted, shrugging.

“Of course you didn't. I'd scold you if I wasn't so impressed. Is it going to be a solo, or are you working your way up to a duet?”

Alec took a deep breath. He was embarrassed to admit that he's envisioned the routine with him and Magnus at the center of it, not to mention asking Magnus to agree to do this with him. Alec had always accepted not being anyone's first priority, it was just the way things were, and he took it for granted that Magnus had better things to do than an extra project like that, as he was graduating this year as well, and composing with Simon and Raphael took precedence. Still, it was Magnus who had inspired Alec, and he couldn't imagine not sharing his vision with him.

“I was thinking of a, uh, a duet as a part of, um... an ensemble dance, actually. And I was wondering if, you, uh... if you'd be willing to be my partner...” He blushed when Magnus raised his eyebrows in mild surprise. “It's extracurricular, of course, nothing binding, just... for fun. Wow, I can't believe I said that... We could work together to come up with steps for you, and some other people who want to practice in their free time, not necessarily from the Institute, I'm sure my sister would love to be a part of it, and-”

“Alexander, breathe,” interrupted Magnus with a chuckle. “I've got a feeling you think you're acting crazy, but you're not, trust me. I'd love to. It's going to be magical. Let's do it! Come on, show me again, I want to get a better feel for it before we start working out where I fit in there. Oh, how exciting, I haven't felt that way in eight years, ever since I took Etta to the prom, and _I_ was the one wearing a dress. It was a blast, Alexander, believe me, and I need to tell you all about it one day, but _this?_ This is even better.”

Alec was shaking with excitement and unadulterated joy, and he was more than happy to oblige Magnus. Dancing now was even easier and more elating, and catching glimpses of Magnus carefully following his every step, even nodding and occasionally taking notes as if he was in class, encompassed Alec in unfamiliar and delightful warmth. The routine seemed to be a natural extension of his very being, and Alec didn't feel disturbed when Magnus suddenly joined him, casually sliding in-between his movements like he _belong_ there, and simply trying things out – he felt complete. When they finished, Magnus laughed at the obvious urgency Alec was thrumming with, apparently under the impression that there was plenty of time for everything, and he was taken aback when Alec finally explained he wanted to start practicing immediately.

“Wait, Alexander, I assumed it was going to be a post-graduation project! I mean, I have time, my solo piece is finished, and Seth would gladly do my part of the group project just to avoid seeing me ever again, but aren't _you_ taking too much on yourself? What about the routine for your showcase? Isn't it in, like, three months?”

“Oh, no, it's fine. Lydia and I have it down to a tee already. We've been practicing only twice a week for a while now. I came up with this routine when I was a _junior_ , Magnus, and Lydia is just amazing, she's much better suited for it than Izzy was. We've only became partners four months ago, and she could already do it blindfolded.”

“Yes, that Lydia sure does sound great,” Magnus bit out petulantly. “I would simply _love_ to hear more about her.”

Alec let out an embarrassed chuckle. “Come on, Magnus, you know I'm gay.”

“I do, but I wanted you to say it out loud. Feels good, doesn't it?”

It did. Everything felt great. He felt amazing. They gave the new routine a shot a couple more times – working with Magnus was a special experience on its own, but _creating_ something with him was beyond imagination. They complemented each other, and every addition or alteration Magnus came up with seemed to intuitively fit into Alec's vision. He felt like he could do it forever, but Magnus eventually ordered him to get some rest. Even though Alec was certain he wouldn't be able to, as soon as his body touched the bed, he felt exactly how exhausted he was, and drifted off to sleep almost immediately.

The first thing he did after waking up in the evening was to tell Izzy about everything (really everything this time), and it was intriguing enough for her to forgive him for “disappearing off the face of the planet for twenty-four hours,” and to sign up for the project straight away. The recruitment of the dancers went much better than expected too – Clary didn't need any convincing at all, as heavens and all the angels knew she needed all the practice she could get, and while Jace absolutely loathed both Magnus and the idea, he's never backed down from a challenge, which mastering hip-hop steps evidently was. Before Alec knew, he had a dedicated dance troupe consisting of his family, closest friends, and people he's never even met.

Alec and Magnus practiced almost every day, but they both acknowledged it was primarily to simply _do_ it together, and get immersed in the incredible feeling that dancing together evoked, than for the actual practice's sake – they both seemed to have been born to perform that dance, as cheesy as it sounded. Getting the group to work well together was a bigger challenge, as everyone had their own priorities, and very limited time to offer, which was the basic requirement for three or four separate groups of friends to learn how to synchronize. They tried their best individually, but together they squabbled, and succumbed to the spirit of competition instead of cooperation. After a couple of weeks of that, Alec wasn't even surprised to find himself in Magnus's apartment, going through all the strengths and weaknesses of the team.

“Lily and Maia keep colliding with each other, and I've had enough experience with alpha females to know we need to put them on the opposite ends of the stage before they attack each other, with Izzy at a safe distance, if possible. That means Elliot and Jordan should be moved as well. But we have to keep Kaelie on the other side of Jace, cause jealousy motivates Clary, and--”

“Yes, yes, and because our sweet Maureen is making such a spectacular progress because she wants to impress Stuart, we should get her to dance directly over his lap. I love it when you talk about people like they were mere game pieces on the board. Take a break, Alexander.”

Alec blushed, ashamed, and put away his notebook to accept the drink Magnus offered. “You're right, sorry. You know I get controlling when I'm stressed. Are you sure you should drink?”

“That's why I want you to loosen up. And please, I've been legally allowed to drink for...” Magnus looked at the non-existent watch on his wrist, pursing his lips. “Three months, sixteen days, and twenty one hours now. In Europe, at least.”

Alec shook his head, grinning. “Not what I meant, but alright. Cheers.”

He smiled around his glass, maintaining eye contact with Magnus as he took a generous sip. It was strong, but tasted sweet, which he expected of Magnus, and it spread pleasant warmth over his body almost instantly. Suppressing a shiver, Alec willed himself to relax, and downed his drink before instinctively shifting closer to Magnus. When he thought of everything Magnus had done for him, of everything he made him feel every second they were together and apart, Alec wished he wasn't so scared.

“Are you referring to my morning rehearsal with Raphael and Silas tomorrow?” asked Magnus teasingly, raising an eyebrow. “Why, Alexander, can it be that you've memorized my schedule? I'm incredibly flattered, and also slightly alarmed. But mostly flattered. Glass always half full.”

“Do you ever stop talking?” whined Alec, mortified at being discovered. “I'm starting to think you live to embarrass me...”

Magnus laughed flippantly. “Oh, there are some very easy ways to shut me up, but I don't think we're there yet. Unless you think we are, I can certainly be persuaded.”

Alec's breath caught audibly, and it was enough for Magnus's taunting grin to slip from his face, and he cleared his throat awkwardly. The atmosphere became tense suddenly, and Alec was hyper-aware of every shift in the air between them. Alec knew very well that Magnus could tell when to stop joking around, and as he realized it was time to be serious right now, he waited. Alec also knew very well that Magnus has been waiting for a very long time already, infuriatingly patient with Alec while never trying to hide what he wanted.

Magnus wanted Alec. Alec wanted Magnus back. It could be simple, if Alec let it. He wanted to let it be simple, and complicated, and magical, and dramatic – anything Magnus would make it to be. Before he could change his mind, he slowly, tentatively, closed the distance between them, and kissed Magnus. It was terrifying, and addictive, bitter-sweet from the drinks and months of anticipation, all-encompassing, really. It was Alec's first kiss. He nearly whimpered when he pulled away, Magnus chasing his inexperienced, unskilled lips; his fingers were tingling.

“Well,” Magnus croaked out, clearing his throat again. “Consider me persuaded, and totally on board. Did you know I have no belly button?”

Alec blinked, confused. “One, that... escalated quickly. And two, what?

“I mean, I obviously have belly button, but it's so perfectly flat you can't even see it. Alexander, please take the hint, and kiss me again before I completely lose all appeal to you.”

Alec did.

He continued to do so every day after that, whenever they felt like it, which was admittedly a lot, because it's been building between them for a very long time, and it was difficult to stop it once the dam broke. They weren't _dating_ , because Alec couldn't just come out of the closet like that, not at such a decisive moment in his life, but Magnus didn't seem to mind; he seemed to understand. Alec knew some people in their group had their suspicions – Izzy and Clary, for example, who were both intuitive and observant, but also had something called _tact_ , which couldn't be said about Raphael, who made gagging noises whenever he saw Alec and Magnus together – but everyone was much more focused on preparing the showcase than on Alec's personal life.

He was startled for the first time he'd thought about what they were doing as practice for his senior showcase, but once the idea generated in his mind, he couldn't disregard it, not with the progress everyone's made, not with how _good_ the dance was. There were no seniors in the dance group except him and Magnus, whose final project was finished, and completely separate from Alec's, and four of his dancers weren't even attending the Institute, so as long as everyone agreed, there were no regulations that could stop them from performing during his senior showcase, as there would be no violation of the anti-fraternization policies concerning graduating contestants.

He started with Jace, who was the most reluctant team member, and the most stubborn person in the world, which meant that Alec could convince just about anyone, if he managed to sell the idea to him; he wasn't wrong. Izzy was more than willing to “stick it to the man,” and everyone was mostly just grateful for the opportunity to show off their skills in front of potential recruiters. The way Magnus kissed Alec later in the evening, passionate and demanding, suggested that he wasn't opposed to the idea either, at the very least – he was even a little offended that Alec expected him to be anything but proud and happy. Everything actually fell into place, as improbable as it seemed, and the last person Alec needed to talk to was his mother.

He didn't expect it to be easy, of course, but his mother's hostility, in front of Lydia as well, was unwarranted.

“You will do no such thing, Alec. You will not throw away your future for an-- for an _experiment_.”

“Magnus isn't an experiment,” he protested, instantly livid enough to be reckless.

Maryse's nostrils flared. “I was referring to your new _routine_ , for lack of a better word, but now I see it's even worse than that. Alec, do you really want to risk everything we've worked for because of some unnatural infatuation?”

Alec couldn't breathe for a moment. He had never given much thought to the idea of coming out to his parents, always almost zealously avoiding the issue, hoping it would simply go away if he ignored it long enough, but he certainly didn't want it to be like that. It was funny, though, the way Maryse just moved past that vital piece of information, making a point of disapproving of it, but mostly just dismissing it as something far less important than Alec's act of blatant disobedience. For the sake of her own ambition, Maryse disregarded his love (Love? Yes, love.) for Magnus as meaningless and wrong, and Alec was hurting, but he was going to fight.

“Don't call it that. Don't _ever_ call it that. And what if I do? What if I want to throw away everything _you've_ made me work for, and do something for myself for once? Something that feels right? I want to do this. I _can_ do this. I am doing this, mother. We have the music and the routine, we have people invested in this as much as we are, and we have enough time to practice. If you want to stop me, you'll have to expel me.”

Maryse was silent for a long moment, and Alec though she's given up for a second. “What about Lydia? You've used her for months, taking up the time she could have used to work on her own routines, to study and practice, and now you're just changing your mind? Do you think that's fair?”

Alec's heart sank, and then it sank even deeper when he realized he hadn't been thinking about Lydia at all. They weren't exactly friends – they had a mutually beneficial, professional partnership – but Alec must have disappointed and let her down regardless, by making such a sudden and huge decision without considering her feelings. He was possibly the worst, most selfish person to ever attend this school, and that was saying a lot. Crestfallen, he turned around to face Lydia, who was hugging her sides, and wearing a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. She shrugged, taking a step towards him, and reached out to stroke his cheek once. Before she could pull away, Alec covered her palm with his.

“I've seen you two practice one time,” she confessed, voice clear. “We are a very good team, Alec, because we are determined to work well together, but we don't have the effortless chemistry you and Magnus share. I don't think anyone in this school has something like that. So, I say: do it. What the hell, Alec, do it, and don't worry about me for a second. It was great practice, and I've improved so much thanks to you. I'll be just fine, you'll see next year. You should do what you think is best for your career. Maybe even what makes you happy. So, thank you, Maryse, for your concern, but it's unnecessary, and I'd appreciate not being used for emotional manipulation of my friends.”

Alec momentarily froze upon hearing Lydia refer to him like that, but he was instantly warm all over. It was true – even if Alec didn't consider himself her friend, she has become his, maybe always has been, and he would do everything he could from now on to deserve her loyalty and kindness. It was quite shocking to realize that in _this –_ whatever that qualified as, a project, an ambition, a dream? – he had the support of everyone in his life, even people who didn't truly know or cared about him, but not his mother. Perhaps he should have seen it coming, in hindsight, because Maryse Lightwood had already shunned her husband and one of her children before, and Alec had never properly hated her for that. He looked at her now, his eyes burning with determination, dignity, and disappointment, but Maryse only gritted her teeth, and averted her eyes.

“Do what you want, Alec, but don't expect me to help you after all this is over, and Alicante wants absolutely nothing to do with you. You can leave now. I've had such high hopes for you... And you're exactly like Isabelle.”

Alec bit back a scream. “I consider it a compliment, mother. Come on, Lydia.”

With that horrid experience out of the way, Alec felt better – he had no obligations except to himself, and people who were generously helping him do something that meant a world to him.

They practiced, as simple as that. They danced, and laughed, and argued, they worked harder if they hit a wall, and celebrated when they managed to overcome it. Alec didn't really appreciate what a difference a good leader could make until Lydia started bossing everyone around, bringing the best out of everyone, and maximizing their potential; Alec decided that the day Lydia had her own dance company couldn't come fast enough.

He was happy. He was hopeful. He was doing what he loved, with someone he loved, and he felt unstoppable. Between perfecting the routine with the group, spending his nights at Magnus's apartment, his days on getting regularly dragged into a whirlwind that was Izzy's constantly changing plans for the future, and learning to finally accept Clary, who loved Jace with more than one could expect from such a small body, as a part of his crazy, doting family, Alec's life has become really good, trouble-free even.

He was almost taken by surprise when the day before his senior showcase finally came. The dress rehearsal left Alec breathless, triumphant, and most importantly, absolutely confident. The way he hugged Magnus at the end, burying his face in the crook of his not-at-all-disgustingly sweaty neck, might have been a bit revealing, but Alec honestly didn't care, and it felt amazing. They were ready.

“Oh, for the love of my cat, I've just realized something,” announced Magnus, throwing up his hands dramatically. “I can't believe I forgot about that! I can't dance _and_ conduct my piece at the same time!”

“I can do it,” Simon piped in immediately. “What? You don't think I can, considering you've been basically molesting me with that piece for almost a year? Hey, I go to this school too, okay, which means I am a man of many talents, and I'll have you know that I'm perfectly capable of conducting your little love song.”

“No, no, that's-- very kind of you, I...” Magnus was speechless for a moment, lips pursed as he was looking for the right words. “Thank you, Simon.”

Simon's eyes widened comically as he stared at Magnus in utter disbelief, using one hand to cover his mouth, while the other reached blindly to find Clary's arm. “Clary. Clary. _Clarissa_ , did you hear that? He called me Simon. He actually knows my name. I might cry.”

“Congratulations, Simon,” said Clary, somehow simultaneously teasing and genuinely delighted.

“Alright, that's quite enough, let's not get emotional,” mumbled Magnus, visibly embarrassed, and shooed everyone away, not that they listened.

Everyone seemed to be in good spirits, excited for the showcase, and getting along much better than when they'd started – Kaelie talking to Clary instead of Jace as they were leaving was the greatest testament to that. Magnus was reluctant to go, so Alec started gathering his things deliberately slowly as well. They all agreed, and that was possibly the most awkward conversation of Alec's entire life, that everyone would go home alone the night before the showcase, and Alec didn't get the idea. When Magnus noticed him staring, brows furrowed in frustration, he stepped closer, fingers discretely brushing against Alec's, and said nothing. He just stood there, smiling, and still managed to set Alec's blood on fire – he understood the stupid rule now.

“Okay,” he decided, his voice cracking despite his best attempts at keeping it professional. “I look forward to seeing you tomorrow.”

“I look forward to seeing you in tights.”

Blushing, Alec looked around to make sure no one has heard them. “W-what?”

“Oh, I think you heard me just fine, Alexander.”

Alec swallowed, barely standing straight. His fingers were itching with the urge to reach for Magnus's hand, but Alec only let his knuckles graze the back of his palm, eyes not leaving Magnus. It was a precaution, taken on instinct, but also a punishment meant for Magnus for playing dirty. He knew how weak Alec was against him, and how much he wanted to spend the night, even if all they ever did in bed was kiss and hold hands. Alec wanted to do more, he really did, and Magnus purposely trying to exploit that knowledge for the first time, not twenty-four hours before the most important night of Alec's life was just... It was driving Alec crazy, and he needed to _go_ , but Magnus was there, looking at him, and Alec didn't want to leave without kissing him at least once.

“Ugh, get a room you two,” demanded Lily suddenly with her trademark dismay.

Raphael whacked her on the back of her head. “Cállate. Yo te crié mejor.”

“Cào nĭ mā... You're not my real dad.”

Raphael cuffed her again, Lily flipped him off, they left, and that was it – over before Alec could even comprehend what happened. The world didn't end. Alec didn't dissolve. Magnus was still there, smiling at him. Alec took a deep breath to help him adjust to the thought, but it was the gentle curve of Magnus's lips that anchored him. With no one else in the room, Alec locked their fingers together – all twenty of them, his shaking slightly, Magnus's warm and sure – and he let his forehead touch Magnus's. He pushed softly, as if it could get him closer to Magnus, and sighed deeply.

“Are we having a breakdown?” asked Magnus.

Alec smiled and shook his head. “No. We're good. Can I kiss you?”

Magnus didn't reply before capturing Alec's mouth in his, and they stayed there much longer than was appropriate, but they both eventually went to their respective homes to get some well-deserved rest.

When Alec woke up the next morning, he wasn't scared, or even nervous, but excited. He'd always had to deal with mild performance anxiety, but he was so sure of what he was about to do that his stomach was tight only with anticipation. Getting ready was a loud and hectic affair, but it kept everyone in good mood, and Alec was almost as proud of them as he was of himself; almost as proud as Magnus was of him.

Maryse was there, and Robert with Max, sitting on the opposite sides of the auditorium, and Alec didn't feel bitter – he welcomed the chance to prove himself, especially now, that he was no longer seeking his their approval. As top of the class, or the Institute's equivalent of it, Alec was performing last, and he was glad about it, because they _were_ going to leave a hell of an impression. As Alec checked on Simon and Raphael, Magnus was shadowing him, smelling really good and distracting him from over-thinking. His silent presence was so comforting that they didn't speak at all, until Magnus made a distressed sound all of the sudden, stopping dead in his tracks.

“My ex is in the jury,” he explained when Alec sent him a questioning look. “The hot older blonde over there in the middle? I haven't seen Camille in four years.”

Alec was appalled. “Okay, wow, seriously, how _old_ actually are you?”

“Oh please, Alexander, you make me sound ancient! Like you've never dated a professor when you were young and impressionable.”

“I've never dated anyone but you,” hissed Alec, annoyed.

Magnus instantly perked up. “Are we dating then? Do you finally admit we're dating? Can I have that in writing? Does that mean we can hold hands in public now? Will you introduce me to Jace as your _boyfriend?_ I'm curious as to how many shades of scandalized his face can turn.”

Alec tried his best to keep a straight face, but he could feel his lips twitch, and he knew Magnus could see that. Shaking his head, he pushed Magnus further into the backstage, and stopped only when Magnus's back gently hit the wall. Casting a quick glance around – out of habit, he realized, as he berated himself for it – he put a hand on Magnus's cheek, and kissed him once, sweetly. His face was hot when he pulled away, and he was embarrassed; he was beginning to think he'd never not be.

“If I don't die out there, I need to tell you something.”

Magnus hummed, half-dazed. “Why would you die, Alexander? You could do it blindfolded.”

“Just preparing for the worst.”

“How sensible.”

They both grinned, and Magnus kissed him. He kept kissing him, soft and slow, until they were both breathless, and Lydia was calling them. Alec took Magnus's hand, and followed her to join his unexpectedly well-oiled machine of a young dance group, ready to blow everyone out there away.

And they did – they were perfect, and Magnus was incredible, and Alec felt like he's been flying again. He saw Max jumping in the air, whooping with joy and pride for his older siblings, his father clapping so hard his whole body shook, and Maryse, gaping in shock at all the people standing up and cheering. Alec felt more alive than ever, his hammering heart louder in his ears than the overwhelming reaction of the crowd, and he's made a decision in that moment.

Once the ovation died down, when it was quiet and peaceful again, he was going to tell Magnus Bane that he loved him, and ask him out on a date.

 


End file.
